Jump to navigation. As many Indo-Canadians know, finding a suitable partner can sometimes seem like an overwhelming task; a delicate act of balance between respect for your family, respect for your heritage, and respect for your personal relationship ambitions. Indeed, many Indian singles in Canada will find themselves juggling questions like how important is it to date someone of East-Indian heritage? Happily, many Indian singles in Canada are finding that this balancing act is made a lot easier when an online dating site is used to help steady the course. The trick, then, is finding the Canadian dating site that will let you focus on all the things you wish to find in a partner, rather than just a small niche. For many Indians dating in Canada, that site is EliteSingles. Indeed, our site is the perfect fit for those Indo-Canadians who see shared heritage as just one of the important pieces that help make up a great match.
Are you a parent of an Indian single living in the US?
Indian millenials have a new phrase which sends terror down their spines: “Hello, I am Sima Taparia from Mumbai. Gone are the days when ‘Six missed calls from Mom’ was the phrase everyone dreaded hearing. For the younger generation, who has been dealt a more ‘modern’ hand at being open to new people, and a more robust dating culture than our earlier generations, the show Indian Matchmaking was absolute everything we didn’t need. While a lot of things prejudices presented on the show are still very much a reality in India, for the younger generations, watching Netflix is an escape mechanism, and hey, if we wanted to face bitter reality, we’d just go talk to our relatives, right?
The concepts of matching ‘kundlis,’ finding a girl who has ‘fair skin,’ and then Taparia’s most famous line – ‘You will have to compromise,’ is something no millennial wanted to hear.
These men and women — or boys and girls, as they are referred to in Indian society, perhaps to reinforce their youth and innocence — of Indian origin are in their 20s and 30s, living in India and the US. Credit: Netflix. Indian Matchmaking just takes this concept further. Of course, each of these comes with their own good, bad and ugly.
I think the entire experience felt like going on a journey with no idea as to what could turn up next. There have always been matchmakers and, more recently, marriage agencies that connected families. And every Indian family has a Sima Mami who offers women unsolicited, and often blunt, advice to wear more make-up, or hit the gym to lose weight, if they ever hope to get married. Despite this sociocultural context, Indian Matchmaking has generated a lot of outrage, with critics and viewers alike accusing the show of playing up — or, at the very least, not critiquing — everything regressive in Indian society.
Words like hate-watch and cringe-fest have regularly featured on social media. For many women, the show was triggering , because of the way it has shone the spotlight on how intelligent, ambitious, successful women are reduced to a set of stereotypical adjectives. The show has sparked outrage on social media from some, with some calling it a hate-watch Credit: Netflix.
However, not everyone agrees that all the criticism about this show is valid, saying it merely holds a mirror to Indian society, warts and all. Not everyone agrees with criticism of the show, with some saying it holds a mirror to Indian society Credit: Netflix.
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I can give her…95 marks out of It is reflective, sometimes painfully, of a custom with which we are all too familiar: arranged marriages. For desis, either your parents were arranged or you know a couple that was. Some people—yep, even millennials—willingly enter into arranged marriages, as seen on the new reality show. While the show portrays arranged marriages in a positive although at times, vulnerable light, it simultaneously showcases the problems plaguing the ancient tradition—problems that Netflix account holders across America were quick to point out.
The casual, rampant racism on IndianMatchmaking is wild, and I fear fair will fly right over the heads of all the white people watching. The super-popular show has garnered criticism for its messages of colorism , classism, and body-shaming. I mean, take your pick. So why are brown people, like myself, forced to answer for a cultural institution I played no part in creating?
The uncomfortable truth is that while these shows perpetuate equally harmful ideas about love and marriage, Indian Matchmaking confirms biases against Indian cultures, making it easier to criticize. No one looks at Western reality shows as representative of white, American dating culture. So why do people think Indian Matchmaking is representative of dating and relationships for all brown people?
We were the ones who dreaded the backlash from before the show dropped on Netflix, and we will be the ones to pick up the pieces after the show subsides from the zeitgeist. Anyone with even the slightest brown tint to their pigmentation has probably been asked for their thoughts on the controversial show.
Why some Singaporeans still turn to Indian matchmakers — but for how long more?
Since its premiere, the Netflix show has managed to grab a fan base with memes, oped pieces, and long Twitter threads. For the unversed, Indian Matchmaking follows Taparia as she matches hopeful singles in the US and India, and ultimately guides them through the arranged marriage process. Taparia, in an interview to Conde Nast Traveller , opened up on her procedure of finding a match, how she turned her hobby into a profession, and why none of the dating apps can ‘compete’ with her process.
Married, single, or in a relationship, quarantine seems to have sent privileged Indians straight to dating apps.
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A dating app called Struck has been launched in some parts of the US, which has a star-alignment as its main feature. This app asks for your location, date, and time of your birth and makes a chart following which it finds potential matches. Further, it goes on to ask you to choose the five traits among those associated with your birth chart both negative and positive that you think best identify you. The aim of the app is to get a person to meet someone suitable for them, according to the placement of the planets and stars.
Within six months of a successful match in , his daughter got married; he is now the proud grandfather of a two-year-old girl. He acknowledged that she may have had difficulty finding a partner as his family were very protective towards her. This practice of engaging traditional matchmakers continues among Indian communities here, even with the availability of modern options for meeting people, like dating apps. But it is not all like the trending Netflix series in which Mumbai-based matchmaker Sima Taparia tries to find partners for the participants.
Aparna Shewakramani left , one of the participants in Netflix’s Indian Matchmaking, on a baking date. Photo: Netflix. The show, Indian Matchmaking, gives audiences a glimpse into the world of arranged marriages in Indian culture. It has also stirred up controversy over its representation of the importance of physical appearance, and its purported perpetuation of fair-skin obsession and casteism.
While matchmakers tell CNA Insider things are different in Singapore and more in sync with what society feels is acceptable, times are tough for them, with the numbers of Indian matchmakers and their clients having shrunk considerably. And they think it will not be long before the practice goes the way of matchmaking traditions in other ethnic communities here — all but dying out.
In Singapore, the traditional matchmakers are largely women, which makes M Govindaraju, who is known by his nickname Mago, somewhat of a rare breed. The former army officer has been in this industry for 40 years, hooking up some couples and counting. Matchmaker Meenachi Suppiah, on the other hand, has been doing this part-time for six years and has made 25 matches so far.
Both of them, who have not seen the Netflix show, said the topic of caste hardly comes up as a selection criterion.
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The journey so far has been nothing short of a miracle. All that’s done out of love, is completely worth the trouble! Globe Icon An icon of the world globe. Link Copied.
Skip to Content. People are matched in hopes of finding suitable marriage partner; marriage is marker of success in matchmaking process. Much of the advice given to women when trying to find compatible matches can be considered sexist; preferences for other attributes can be interpreted as racist or classist both within Western and Indian circles. Clients range from being inflexible in their criteria to being unwilling to commit.
Parents often state that all they want is happiness for their son or daughter, but then reveal very specific criteria for their future son- or daughter-in-law. Alcoholic beverages wine, champagne, cocktails are sometimes consumed during social gatherings and dates. One date makes a point of noting that he doesn’t drink alcohol. Parents and caregivers: Set limits for violence and more with Plus.
People often drink wine, mimosas, and cocktails at social gatherings and during dates. Families can talk about the class issues that are still present in India and how the show presents them, as well as the idea of arranged marriage itself. Join now. Add your rating. Professional matchmaker Sima Taparia works with clients in India and in the United States to find them perspective mates.